How To Stop Procrastination

Procrastination is the intentional and habitual postponement of an important task that should be done now. Procrastination is fostered by habit. So if you want to stop procrastinating, you will have to break old habits and develop new ones.  But first, try to understand the causes for your procrastination. If you can, you’re halfway there.  Recognize the difference between an appropriate decision to delay and an irrational postponement without justification. If you find yourself waiting for information from someone else, then it is appropriate to delay a project.  If not, overcome procrastination through task strategies in an environment where distractions are minimized.
 TASK STRATEGIES
Unpleasant tasks

• Unpleasant tasks rarely turn out to be as bad as you think.
• Complete these tasks first. Schedule them for early in the day. Give yourself a reward for doing them.

Complex Projects

• Something looms ahead of you: starting a small business, getting a job, preparing the annual budget. The job is too big or will take too long to do now, so you put it off.
• Break large jobs into smaller, more manageable tasks. Plan and complete a start-up task, no matter how small.

Indecision

• People delay because they can’t make up their minds.
• Determine a time for making a decision and the criteria for making it. Share your deadline with someone else.

Fear of failure (lack of self confidence)

• People don’t want to face the consequences of failure, so they delay. (Some people suffer from fear of success too!)
• Develop a clear mental picture of the completed task and how you will feel at that time. Maintain a focus on the end result, not just the process. Remind yourself how good you’ll feel when you’re finished.

Lack of interest

• You are tired or  lazy. You’ re just not very interested in the task.
• Reward yourself for accomplishments. Go out for special lunches when major projects are completed. If you don’t earn the reward, don’t take it.
• Schedule the task for when you will be at your peak.

Perfectionism

• People delay because they want to get the project perfect.
• Set deadlines for yourself. Tell other people your deadlines and encourage them to check up on you.
• Maintain your high standards, but recognize that sometimes 80% for you may well be 100% for someone else. Don’t spend hours conducting a detailed cost breakdown when a rough estimate would suffice.

Hostility towards a boss

• People delay because they don’t like the person who assigned the task.
• Review with your boss what exactly is needed. Clarify the expectations.
• Make a game out of unpleasant tasks. Give yourself points, or do a running commentary on yourself as you do the task.

Distraction, lack of focus

• Sometimes losing concentration causes delays.
• Create a to-do list with priorities.
• Block your time for projects.
• As you get distracted from a work project, make a rule that you are not allowed to move out of your chair, make a call, surf the net, pick up a book etc. until you return to your task.
• Complete something. Make a very small task for yourself and finish it. Very small. Then, make another one.

Unimportant tasks
Something needs to be done, but it isn’t that important. You have a leaky roof, but you don’t mind putting a small glass under it. The trouble is, things will get worse. Or you have a few repairs around the house that need to be done. All of a sudden you need to move. Fixing those repairs to make the house saleable will be difficult.

• Calculate the possible future cost of not doing things.
• Schedule time. Break tasks into small pieces.

ENVIRONMENT STRATEGIES
      Tailor your environment for work. Close your door, clean up the clutter on your desk.

• Remove distractions such as water coolers, snacks, in-boxes, coffee machines and magazine racks.

      If you work at home, treat your office as an office. Don’t go out to lunch before lunchtime or watch television before the end of the day.

• Tell your family that you are not to be disturbed in your home office

• Turn off your email notication to prevent interruptions.

THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WHEN YOUR BORED

Blink wildly and then close your eyes really tight for an interesting light show
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
See a variety of blobs, stars and flashes. Try to make out shapes and see if your subconscious is trying to send you a message (perhaps that funny shape is saying, 'send all your money to urban75.com'?)

See how long you can hold a note
(Amusement Potential: 4-20 minutes)
Not that much fun, but it sure passes the time. Play with a friend, or try to beat your own personal best. Inhale deeply and then try and make a noise for as long as you can. Earn extra points for making your partner laugh or ending on an amusing note.

Try to not think about penguins
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
This is especially hard, because by trying too much, you remember what you were trying to avoid thinking of. If you try too little, you end up thinking about penguins anyway.

Use your secret mind power
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Pick a passing by and try to use your mind power to command them do something, like drop their bag or knock into someone. The law of averages dictates that sooner or later one of your mind commands will come true, so you can convince yourself that you really have super human powers and waste even more time trying them out.

Pretend you're a robot
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Walk down the street with mechanical movements, adding 'zzzzzt' sounds with each motion. Pretending to have a motor broken in, say, your left hand can add at least 30 seconds more entertainment.

Scratch yourself
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Go ahead, scratch yourself now. Even if nothing itches, go ahead. Doesn't that feel pretty good?

Rate passers by
(Amusement Potential: 10-15 minutes)
Secretly award passers by marks out of ten as you go along, offering (unsaid) expert criticism over their clothing, hairstyle and footwear choices.

Repeat the same word over and over until it loses its meaning
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Pick a random word out of a magazine and say it aloud to yourself until it becomes a meaningless set of noises.

Pinch yourself
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
What is pain? Why is it unpleasant? There's nothing physical about it - it's all in your mind. Plus, after pinching yourself for awhile, boredom will seem nice next to being in pain.

Try to swallow your tongue
(Amusement Potential: 1-2 minutes)
There's not much to say about this one. It is possible, but really stupid.

Pretend to be a car
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Make appropriate revving noises in your head as you walk along and add a racing commentary as you pass strangers in the street. Use blinking eyes as indicators for extra authenticity.

Make Star Trek door noises
(Amusement Potential: 1-2 minutes)
Stand by an electric door to a bank or something and make that silly "Scccccccchwop" sound heard whenever people popped on to the bridge to hang with Captain Kirk.

Look at something for awhile, shut eyes, study after image
(Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes)
Another great time waster. It takes about 30 seconds of staring to create an after image, and the image is then viewable for about the same length of time. Fun to combine this one with pushing on your eyes.

Get yourself as nauseated as possible
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Best achieved by looking straight up and spinning around. Try to be so dizzy you can't even stand up. This is also entertaining due to the "makes boredom seem a lot better" effect (see "Hurt Yourself").

Invent a weird twitch
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Adopt a bizarre twitch (e.g. flicking your head irregularly, twitching with eye or busting out sporadic cough noises) and try it out when you go shopping.

Make a low buzzing noise
(Amusement Potential: 15-30 minutes)
Hours of fun in libraries! Keeping a totally straight face and looking nonchalant, make a low pitch humming/buzzing noise and see who reacts.

Top 10 Compliments to Pay a Woman

1. Notice a change. Yes, this is an old cliché. But it's also a true one: we women like it if you notice something new about us. If a woman you've had your eye on changes her hairstyle or color, wears a new dress, or (if you're internet dating) changes the main photo on her profile, let her know you noticed. And that you like it.
2. Her best feature. We women are just as much victims of our vanity as men are. And we love to feel like we have something special, something superior that no other woman has. Whether she has an incredible butt, gorgeous hair, perfect skin, or an infectious smile, specific and honest compliments about a woman's superior features always go over well. And be sure to be clear! "You have the prettiest smile I've ever seen," is a lot nicer to hear than, "You have a nice smile."
3. Her smell. Most women pride themselves on being feminine. And a big part of femininity --and feeling attractive to men-- is smelling nice. Noticing that a woman smells nice is sure to make her feel feminine, beautiful, and attractive. Which will make her much more likely to feel well-disposed to you... and let you come in closer for another sniff.
4. Her kissing. Most people think they're good kissers... but most of them can't be sure they are unless somebody lets them know. If a woman you're dating is a fantastic kisser, tell her so! And be double sure to let her know if she's the best you've ever kissed: women like to have their egos pumped up almost as much as men do.
5. Her intelligence. Because we know that (especially at the beginning of a relationship) men are more focused on our physical attributes than our intellectual ones, compliments about a woman's intelligence always go over well. "You're the most intelligent woman I've ever dated," is sure to get a good reception, and have her feeling appreciated all night. Especially if she's felt passed over in the past because she's "too smart."
6. She's thin. Ever hear the expression, "you can never be too rich or too thin"? Well, I'm not sure there's such a thing as too rich, but there's most certainly such a thing as too thin. That said, most women love the idea of being slim and lithe and desirable. Telling a woman that she's slim is bound to make her feel good, and to feel like she's accomplished something (after all, most slim women work very hard to stay that way!).
7. Her uniqueness or special qualities. All people like to feel that they're special and one of a kind-- especially to somebody they're dating. If you're dating a woman who seems different and special, be sure to let her know you see her that way. "I've never dated anybody like you," may not sound like a compliment, but it's bound to be taken as one.
8. Her specific ability. Complimenting a woman on something special she can do is a great way to show that you're paying attention. And that you appreciate her for more than her looks. "It's amazing that you speak another language, " or "I've never met anybody with your ability to remember lyrics," will be music to her ears. Just be specific and be honest.
9. Her integrity or personality. Everybody likes to think that they have a great personality, or that they have a particular quality that they should feel good about. And it's great to hear about them! If a woman you're dating (or would like to date) is unabashedly honest, always kind, or uproariously funny, let her know you think so. Sometimes these are the best kinds of compliments.
10. Her superlative hotness. If you can honestly (or semi-honestly) tell a woman that she's the hottest thing you've ever dated (or, say, the most beautiful woman in the room), do it. This is the kind of compliment that never gets old.

Things to do right before you die

The most important part of a good death is remembering all the fun stuff you've done before you died. So, because most people's lives suck, it is recommended that you do some of the following:

• When you see somebody grilling, run into their yard, grab the meat, throw it on the ground and stomp on it while yelling "pickle-juice!!!!!!" at the top of your lungs (If you plan on committing suicide, this is the surest way)
• Make a mess in every public bathroom you enter
• Stand in public doorways telling people you don't feel like moving
• Grease the monkey bars at all playgrounds
• Follow random people all the way into their house and eat all their food
• Wait in the bushes with paintball gun during mischief night (you know what to do from there)
• Brag to everyone about how you got the latest version of AOL for free in the mail
• Buy a new item which you've longed for about a year then refrain from using, eating, playing with, touching, seeing, hearing, smelling, or thinking about it for about a week then preceed to use the item in the way you see fit if you remember what it was or were it was.
• Tell people you did their mom. Also tell them to go pick some.
• Lick door knobs right before people can leave the room
• Randomly scream "paranormaitly desciptvidly conjucationalized hikikomorian" at the top of your lungs
• Pretend to run a cheese store but carry only pickles.
• Ask people questions over and over
• When someone is trying to tell you a story say, "Could you tell me the beginning of that middle part of the end please?"

Then, when they're done, ask them about the beginning, then the end, until they don't remember what they were talking about.

• Prank phone call everyone in the phone book telling everyone your name is john Jackson.

Actually, besides being just fun, many of these things could directly lead to your certain death. And when you do die nobody will give a damn because you suck and died a virgin. You also still live with your mother. The Game.

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